so take a look at me now

'cause there's just an empty space

phillcollins.mariahcarey

*



ns entry alert.
warning: this may bore you but i dont care i need my space to just get things out of my mind.

and so, it has begun.extras,guard duties,scolding sessions,mass signing of the informal punishment book for sgts and all the other shit work. they are all coming one after another like as though this entire series of the worst-is-yet-to-come episode is well orchestrated and well planned by HIM-encik/csm.

every single minute i spend in the company line is dreadful. i hate it. its taking a toll on me. and it gets prety frustrating. i work my ass off to really do a good job but its always a question of, if is it good enough? go to hell laa. the worst part is getting punished for things that isnt my fault. its ridiculous.just plain ridiculous.
and some people can just smoke their way through admist all this shit that is going around.
talk about pride of specialists? my foot okay. from the way YOU treat us, its as good as i'm just a normal men wearing a uniform that bears the rank of a 3rd sgt. in fact i think my men is having a better time than me. they have me to turn to. who do we as specialist have to turn to? you? of course no! at the end of the day, if we ever raise any concerns to you, it will ultimately be our fault.its always ours.never yours. is it that hard to simply admit that it is your fault?

whats your fettish with inspections and standardisation? its ridiculous!

what i need is just a day for myself. a day free from worries.
fuyee, only you would understand the fate of bravo specs.
it is bad. no wonder you ran every night around camp just to get yourself out from all the hype that is happening in the company line. and i would do just that.

now, i cant even watch my Puterigunungledang musical.wth.so yeah, su its off.
thanks ah.you've just made my life livinghell.

i did COS duty on a saturday. it was pretty hectic in the morning when all the big shots were around but it gets better when all of them leaves. you'll get to just sit at the stone table looking at planes landing.enjoying the breeze, hearing music from the radio and just relax.ah, relax-a term that is hard to come by as a bravo spec. it was not too bad. although it was a saturday that could have been spend better with family/friends, i did enjoy myself doing COS all alone in the company line :)

to my friends having exams, gd luck.
i noe you would rather switch places with me and deal with all this shit than studying and feeling the pressure of doing well.
but trust me all things, good or bad will come to an end.hang in there :)
how long can the darkest or stressful 2 weeks be? its still 2 weeks, so hang in there.



*

'Cause I'm the one that loves you lately.

You and me, we got this great thing.

We're the only one's that around,

We're the only one's that around this Babylon.

I hope you find whatever you've been lookin' for.

Just remember where you're from and who you are, '

Cause there's a thousand lights that'll make you feel brand new,

But if you ever lose your way,

I'll leave one on for you.

So, come back and you sit down. Relax.

Everything's to see that you've come a long, long way,

And it's the place that you should be.

danielpowter.loveyoulately